July 2010 Archives

Those who have known me for some time know that every now and then I do something a little stupid. Not on purpose. And not really bad life-altering type stupid. Just kind of absent-minded type stupid.

This morning before driving to work I went over to a phone store because I am trying to decide between two smart-phones. After visiting with the techies at the phone store I returned to the now much fuller parking lot.

I walked up to the truck, a tan Ford Explorer Sport Trac, and put my key in the lock. But it would not turn. I tried turning a little harder. No good. A lady walked by. I smiled briefly at her, somewhat embarrassed. I made like I was messaging someone or something, until she drove away.

Then, I walked over to the passenger side door, and tried once again. No good. What the heck is wrong with my locks? Perhaps the microchip in my key is shot. That would suck. Well, hopefully I can get in using the touch pad on my driver side door.

I walked back over to the driver side door, and the touch pad was gone. GONE! Not that it had been pried off or anything. There was just NO SIGN of it. Where before it had always been there, now in its place was simply a bare, tan door.

For about twenty seconds I stood there dumbfounded. How could my touch pad just VANISH, COMPLETELY?

And the hood! The hood was all kinds of discolored! This horrified me! I thought I had cleaned all that bird poop off my hood before it started eating away at my paint job! What has happened to my beautiful truck?

I felt like Bruce Willis at the end of the Sixth Sense. You know, where things you never saw have suddenly appeared or things you thought were there all along turn out to be illusions.

...

By now you have probably been saying something to me like, "Wrong truck dumba--." Yes, I know. It was right about then that I looked at exactly where I was standing, and said, "Hmm, this feels a little different from where I thought I parked."

I looked down a few cars, and sure enough, there was my truck. Touch pad, clean hood and all. I walked over discreetly, got in, no problem, and started it up -- all the while looking around, hoping no one was filming me. Because if they were, I may be the next video on fail blog.

This morning on my way in to work I was listening to one of my favorite radio shows, the Bobby Bones Show on 96.7 KISS FM. Bobby read an email from a young woman who had hooked up a year ago with ... some guy.

As a result, she got pregnant, and got an abortion, without informing the man of either. Her question: Should she inform the man she hooked up with?

Bobby solicited opinions from listeners, and he offered his own along with his colleagues on the show, Lunchbox, Carlos, and Amy, who is known among the group for being more religious.

All of the men agreed that the young woman should not tell the man about the pregnancy or the abortion, because it is too late to do anything about it, it wouldn't do the man any good, and he probably wouldn't want to know anyway. Amy wondered what pregnancy counselors would say.

Below is a comment I emailed to Bobby, Lunchbox, and Carlos (known as "Los").

Hey Bobby, Lunch and 'Los:

I'm a regular listener to your show and I thoroughly enjoy it -- even though when you all are talking about what to do in relationship situations I disagree with you guys fairly often.

But today I feel compelled to share my thoughts on what you guys discussed -- specifically the young lady who got an abortion without telling the father (or father-to-be, depending on one's beliefs regarding prenatal life), and whether she should.

Just to let you know, I'm a Catholic in my 20s, engaged to be married in September to a beautiful, awesome woman -- and suffice to say, in the words of Kelly Clarkson, "I do not hook up." So yeah, I'm usually on Amy's side. And I don't suspect anything I say will surprise you.

The young woman should absolutely tell the man that she became pregnant and got an abortion. As soon as possible.

My concern is not whether the guy has a right to know. My concern is not whether he would want to know. My concern is not whether it would do him any good to know. My concern is whether someone else -- particularly, some future potential one night stand -- might benefit from him knowing.

I would argue, she clearly would.

As long as Captain Hookup is blissfully ignorant that he caused a pregnancy that ended in an abortion, his behavior will not change.

I understand that maybe one or more of you gentlemen on the show may not have a problem with his behavior -- at least with the hookup, per se. I don't judge you guys for that. We have a difference of opinion.

But that may be because, to your knowledge, you've never been in a situation like his. If you were informed that one of your hookups aborted a pregnancy you caused, would that make you think differently about hooking up? Might it change the way you live your life? The decisions you make? Is that, at least in part, why you wouldn't want to know?

You may also question whether informing Captain Hookup would actually cause him to change his behavior. Maybe he knows he has already caused four pregnancies that ended in abortions, and doesn't care. Perhaps. But I would argue he is at least more likely to change his behavior if he knows.

Because he may very well be going about his life with no idea that the way he is living it creates situations like the young woman's whose email you read today. That would be a valuable lesson for him to learn, and it may save another young woman down the road similar misfortune and potential heartache. If it creates heartache for him, well, he earned it.

Thanks for reading, fellas. Have a great day.

M

The Washington Post reports that in Salt Lake City, Utah, at Temple Square and Brigham Young University, Mormons seem to be working with Catholics on marriage prep.

"Mormons have a lot to teach Catholics about emphasizing marriage as a God-given vocation," writes Anthony Stevens-Aroyo, a Catholic.

Whether Catholics must learn from Mormons about the holiness of marriage is up for debate, as far as I'm concerned. But there is no question that many of us Catholics certainly can learn about the holiness of marriage from someone.

It is sometimes believed in Catholic circles that the celibate priesthood is the way to go if one is "holy" like that, while marriage is more "natural" and "normal." On the other end of the spectrum the celibate priesthood (or religious life) is considered the really honorable thing for a person to do with one's life, while marriage is considered somehow more worldly and less righteous. I will sometimes hear people pray for "vocations to the priesthood and religious life." Nothing wrong with that of course.

But Archbishop Timothy Dolan of New York has said most aptly:

"That's where we have the real vocation crisis. We have a vocation crisis to lifelong, life-giving, loving, faithful marriage. If we take care of that one, we'll have all the priests and nuns we need for the Church."

He is absolutely correct.

The joining of one man and one woman in holy matrimony is just as much God's idea as is the priesthood.

Stevens-Arroyo continues:

In Catholic America, I fear, we don't advertise often enough that the Sacrament of Marriage is a vocation. While the LDS and a host of Protestant churches function as places to meet "good wives" and "reliable husbands" for believers seeking worthy marriage partners, Catholic churches pray more often for celibate vocations to the priesthood and religious life. Certainly, celibacy is an essential gift to the church and should be maintained, but there are far more Catholics who are married than those who are celibate. If we need priests to function as Christ's Church, we also need married people to fill the pews and take on lay ministries.

It's been a really long time since I've written about anything purely political. But I came across this interview on CNBC with Rep. Paul Ryan, a member of Pres. Obama's debt commission.

Ryan has been talking a lot lately about how to get the country out of its current debt crisis.

His upshot: "We got to get the entrepreneurial economy started again."

"We're replacing basic free enterprise with crony capitalism, where you have big business using their largesse and their connections with big government to stack the deck in their favor," Ryan says. "To have the rules set for the incumbents in business, which are to erect barriers to entry against other would-be competitors that would knock them off the top of the hill. So I'm really worried that many of us are confusing being pro-market with being pro-business. We need to have a free enterprise system where everybody has access to capital markets."

That's a key distinction. The reputation of conservative elected officials is that they are pro-business. Certainly some of them are. But what Ryan demonstrates is that sound fiscal responsibility consists in being pro-market -- i.e., in favoring equal opportunity. That means cutting back on subsidies, cutting back on throwing dollars at certain individual companies or sectors, and simply allowing the market -- which is composed of individual entrepreneurs, inventors, and producers -- to do what it does best.

This doesn't mean producers in the market will not be held to account if they behave criminally. Laws are in place for a reason and they should be enforced. But what we have gotten away from in America is a sense of independence. The idea that the key to prosperity and happiness is freedom and liberty to prosper oneself and one's family. If the nation is to climb out of its current debt situation and the current recession, it will be individuals, families, and local communities -- the private sector, not the public sector -- that do it.

Here's Ryan's conversation on CNBC.

***
The discussion reminds me of something my best man Brandon Kraft wrote in his (and formerly also my) blog Catholic Thinker about the difference between working for good and working for greed. The illustration he cites is Gordon Gekko from the 1987 film Wall Street. Certainly that is a good, albeit fictional, illustration of the vice and certainly it is an accurate portrayal of some on Wall Street.

I would add that greed is not just in the private sector. It is everywhere. No government can spend itself into trillions of dollars in debt without being greedy. And it is my opinion that most private consumers are smart and know greed when they see it (more so than the government, I'd wager). Greed doesn't pay in a marketplace populated by consumers with a moral compass.

So again, the point is that to be a supporter of a free and unencumbered market is not the same as siding with unethical Wall Street hacks and big business. Often, as Ryan makes plain, it is the very collusion of such types with the government that make it difficult for up-and-comers to prosper themselves and build a good life for themselves and their families. A free market, as distinguished from crony capitalism, is crucial to addressing what may become the growing problem of poverty in the United States.